Messages

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 24, 2026, 11:42:37 AM »

She counting on the day he leaves earth and getting em life insurance money. This game has been played for decades. LOL....j.k

I tell many middle aged women who tells me, they are lonely, they need a man, they wished they can start over, etc...that, all they really need is God..but in order for that, they must really live by the words of the Gospel..not just preach it, worst not use it in any manipulative form....hahah I"m not religious or Godly, but I just know things naturally, because well, maybe I'm from Heaven... LOL

In life, it's just a learning experience for the most part. Humans were meant to make mistakes, some life altering, some heartbreaking, and some- life ending...But the dark truth is, these things must happen in order for humans to be prepare for what is the real reality....the Heavens....bec ause in teh Heavens, there is no room for mistakes.....h ahaha In the end, the truth is....it's not anyone, but the demons in them.....

The only love of someone's life should be God. Partners in this day and age come and go. Very few couples actually work through their problems.

I highly admire those who separated and even divorced, only to find each other again. That is a great example of being each other's "the one". It reminds me of Abraham and Sarah's relationship. At one point Sarah even married a king because Abraham wanted the people to think they were only brother and sister in order to spare his life. He knew that men desired Sarah's beauty and would kill him in order to make her their wife. But in the end they stayed together until their very last days.

Cov niam txiv es rov sib yuav yeej tsis muaj leej twg thuam tau li os. Doesn't matter what kind of BS they put each other through. It's their marriage and if they can accept each other's flaws then who is anybody to tell them otherwise?

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 24, 2026, 11:29:53 AM »

The love of your life implies that this is the one and only person you've ever had a relationship with. Having multiple relationships whether good or bad means that you had many partners whom you enjoyed while it lasted. You probably thought every single one of them was "the one" in the beginning during the honeymoon phase. lol!!!!

Unless you're a 40 year+ virgin whose never been in a relationship, no such thing as having found the love of your life after you've had multiple relationships.

Some of y'all just upset because you don't want to view your current relationship at your age as transactional and out of convenience. But there is no shame in that. People are built for companionship. Nothing wrong with entering a relationship because you need an emergency contact, and/or are seeking a hunting/fishing/traveling/eating pho partner. Many people do this because they don't have children, and some do it because their children are grown and out of the house.

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 24, 2026, 11:23:04 AM »

Very ignorant of you due to your narrow mind but NOT SURPRISED coming from you.   

FACT says, it's not just "purely for convenience" as reasons can vary...

Giving examples of divorced/widowed/single people in their second, third, fourth and beyond relationships IS EXACTLY THE REASON WHY THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS HAVING THE LOVE OF ONE'S LIFE. Perhaps one of the many loves of their life, but one true love? LOL!!!!

Based on your own relationship history, your wife is just one of the loves of your life.

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 17, 2026, 11:49:11 AM »

If they tell you that they are with the love of their life then they are lying.

No such thing if they've been in several serious relationships.

Perhaps the "loves" of their life - notice the plural???

A woman whom I went to school with has been living with an old, white guy in his late50-mid60s for a few years now. This dude looks like Santa Claus. She, on the other hand, was a very beautiful and desired girl back in the day. Her ex-Hmong husband was also very handsome, smart and came from a well-to-do family. She was crazy in love with him. But they eventually divorced.

She told me that this white dude is good to her and she is content. NO way in h@ll would she have been attracted to him if we're being honest here. But now that she is much older and divorced, she is looking for different things in a partner.

Not exactly the love of her life but good enough to feel at peace.

5

General Relationship / Re: If I'm single again

« on: April 17, 2026, 11:26:46 AM »

Not sure if I want to marry again.  Having a man is a plus but not a necessity.  However, for sure a travel partner.

...this and only this reason. 

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: God removes people from your life because He knows you love them too much...

« on: April 17, 2026, 11:15:59 AM »

God knows you deserves better. 

We, human, only see a side or two of the person we love but God sees the total person and therefore did not grant our desire because he wants to give us the very best.

 

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: Despite of what others think one should still do what's right for one

« on: April 14, 2026, 10:42:24 AM »

Yes and no.

It depends on how one's decisions impact their family, community, and overall society.

Some people prefer to use drugs to cope with their problems. Therefore, becoming meth addicts and homeless. Even if you offered them a job they couldn't perform it. In fact, they choose not to because it's a responsibility that they don't want.

People who choose singlehood eventually become a burden to their family and society. When they become sick or die, someone else is burdened to take care of this because they do not have a spouse or children to take care of it. Even the ones who have money will rely on nurses, doctors, nursing home, etc. (all things outside the family).

NOTE: We are not talking about dysfunctional families because I know how PH liberals LOVE to bring up...but what if your spouse is abusive? what if your children are bums?

We are not talking about dysfunctional families.

We are talking how "all things equal", married people with children always have an advantage over single people.

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: Yes, you can still find the love of your life even when you're an elderly, FACT!

« on: April 14, 2026, 10:07:27 AM »

People can still find a companion whom they enjoy spending time with at any age. Nobody is questioning that. But it's still transactional.

So you're telling me that she had two loves of her life in a single life time?

 

When we say the love of one's life, we mean one person whom one built an abundant life with that bore fruits!!!! And that relationships endures.

Otherwise, a lot of Hmong men have many, many, many loves of their life. They have multiple wives and children with each and everyone.

 

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 13, 2026, 04:14:32 PM »

It's really just to have an emergency contact.

That's what they tell me. lol!

When a man says that there are always women, that's what he means. He is just looking for a transactional relationship that works for his circumstance.

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General Relationship / Re: Many Hmong women didn't have a say but if you Hmong women have a choice, would

« on: April 11, 2026, 02:44:32 AM »

This gives me the big ICK.

It also turns me off when a man has had multiple serious girlfriends because in my mind I will always be thinking about how he must have flattered all of them with sweet words, gifts, plans, promises, and all sorts of attention as if she was the love of his life. I will be thinking, "wow, all these things he said to me he said to another woman." He even thought she was the one. This is why I dislike Ted Mosby from "How I Met Your Mother".

I will view him as lacking self-discipline. Like really? You thought you were in love with each girlfriend at the time that you were with them? Made them believe that they were the one only to be discarded in the end? Sounds like you used them to get access to them and then dumped them.

But for some reason if a man is divorced it doesn't bother me as much. A man showing love, affection, to his wife, is him showing commitment and investment in his marriage. He did those things obviously because it's expected of a husband. But if things didn't work out then it just didn't. Not a red flag unless he was the one who sabotaged it.

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General Discussion / Re: these "Republican control red state" are really poor.... and unedcated

« on: April 10, 2026, 04:51:52 PM »

go to the deep south and see those run down city
makes you wanna go back to those hippy blue city

 

you been brain wash by FOX NEWS and right wing media

You mean visit the run down cities that are widely known to be run down?  Unlike liberal areas where they boast about the happening vibes but you better not get caught crossing the street during lunch hour. 

That's the thing! Liberals berate Fox News but Fox News has always been public about leaning conservative. Unlike CNN, which claims to be bipartisian. 

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General Discussion / Re: I can't fake it anymore

« on: April 10, 2026, 04:46:05 PM »

Truth be told, I never got the feeling that you were faking your feelings about Trump. Pretty sure that you were loud and clear about your disdain for him. 

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Marriage & Family Life / Re: There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 10, 2026, 04:44:17 PM »

I'm actually not against this type of agreement at all, and think that it has longevity potential as long as both people uphold their vows. In fact, marriage is kind of a transaction anyways where each person is expected to fulfill a role. If you take the emotions out of the equation, it might actually keep everyone sane! No anxiety, no unmet expectations, and certainly no unhealthy attachments.

 

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Marriage & Family Life / There is no such thing as marrying the love of your life when you're past 45

« on: April 10, 2026, 04:35:58 PM »

I hear this all the time from people past their mid-40s. Those in their 50s will affirm. Those nearing 60 just say "forget about it!"

A relationship at that age is purely for convenience and transactional.

An older man who chooses a woman his age or older looks for someone to perform household duties so that he has more time to enjoy his recreational hobbies, and for when he is experiencing issues due to deteriorating health.

An older, childless man who chooses a younger woman is basically racing against time. It's his last chance at leaving a legacy. This pertains to the men who actually want a child. For the ones who don't, it is purely for lust and an ego-booster.

The good news is that the women who agree to this arrangement also understand that it's about convenience and transaction for them, too.

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Faith & Beliefs / Re: It's actually not un-Christian to call an entire city evil

« on: April 10, 2026, 04:19:27 PM »

i have relatives who lives in the TWIN CITY
no, they are not evil people

 

very chill people that just want to work and make money to help their family

 

YOU HAVE REALLY UNCLEAN NASTY EVIL THOUGHTS

i will pray for you

Lot had his entire life settled in Sodom. Yet, God called him to leave. Your relatives can make money elsewhere.