Going to Laos... For Dummies (Like Me)

[NceegVaj]

***Greetings from Laos***

Hello to all my PH buddies...

I am still alive! Yahoo. So, to just to update everyone, I have been here for a little a week now.

First 2 nights was spent in Vientiane visting Victory Park, Buhda Park and going to the Friendship Bridge. Vientiane smells with lots of smog and open sewage. An occassion breeze is always welcome. The temperature is still HOT!!!!!!!!!! Humidity is high and you fell like you need a bath every 4 hours. But I love it, I am taking it all in. The Lao people are extremely friendly and only a few understands English. Hand gestures are the way to go here, just point to what you want to eat, where you want to go and what you want to buy.

We left Vientiane for Nong Hai on days 3 and spent the rest of our time in a small town... Puusan. Beautiful country, dotted with lime stone mountains... the rice was just recently harvested. Less traffic and totally lay-back!

Note to everyone... road to Nong Hai is Dusty!!!! Don't wear tennis shoes and don't wear white socks.

I miss everyone every much and hope to post some pics soon. Internet connection here is super slow... so I will take to you guys in a few days.... LGH

Ok Honey !! we miss you this MUUUUUUUUUUUUU UUUUUUUUCCCCCC CCCCCCCCCCHHHH HHHH....link up some pics to up !! and yes, the young girls lingering around you?   Feed them well.......... .......oh, where's the new year parties?

[Dok_Champa]

I have family in Nong Hai   They are having their new year soon.. I hope you are able to join them in the celebration.  Have a safe trip..  Enjoy your stay..take in the good, the bad, and the ugly... 

How are the hotels in Laos? Water? Bathroom?

[MenyuamHmoob]

LAos was great! Saw the very bright side of Laos and the very sad side as well.  Makes you appreciate what we have here in the states a lot more.

[MenyuamHmoob]

yeah, i will as soon as im done uploading them on my computer. 

[NceegVaj]

LAos was great! Saw the very bright side of Laos and the very sad side as well.  Makes you appreciate what we have here in the states a lot more.

Bright side = young vaginas?

Black side = beggars?

[MenyuamHmoob]

Bright side = young vaginas?

Black side = beggars?

NceegVaj, its easy for anyone living in the US to generalize and assume things about Laos based on rumors/myths/exaggerations.  Some of the bad things we've heard are true, but over exaggerated. And vice versa.  You'll need to just go to really experience it. 

[NceegVaj]

NceegVaj, its easy for anyone living in the US to generalize and assume things about Laos based on rumors/myths/exaggerations.  Some of the bad things we've heard are true, but over exaggerated. And vice versa.  You'll need to just go to really experience it. 

I agree.  We'll have Lonely explain it all when he's back.

[LonelyHmgGuy]

***Back in the USA***

Wow! What a trip!    and what a let down to be back. Argghhhh, I did not want to leave, they had to drag me back onto the plane for the ride home!

Firstly, thank you all for the well wishes and comments. I did have a good time and took many pictures. I will share them as soon as I download them. I will also have a more detail blog in a few days... but right now, let me just say that my 3 weeks came and went too fast, days felt like minutes and hours felt like seconds... I was so bummed on my last day and did not want to leave.
 
So to recap... after my last blog about being in Nong Hai, we decided to travel up to Luang Prabang and spent 3 days there. From Luang Prabang, we went back down to Xieng Khouang and Phonsavan to start the Hmong New Year celebrations. After 4 days in Phonsavan, it was back down to KM 52 to enjoy the rest of Hmong New Years on an VIP bus.

Everyone jokes about it and we all have heard the stories about Laos... the good, the bad and the ugly. But let me just say that you must really go and decide for yourself. No matter what I or others may say, you must really experience it yourself... each of us is different and everyone will come away with a different view and a different take on how things are.

For me, Laos was beautiful, relaxing, and so peaceful... I can not wait to go back. Every morning started with an early breakfast for the whole family and every night ended with everyone talking and sharing stories around the family fire. Everything would seem a like struggle, especially for those of us who were born or raised in the US...  there were chickens/pigs/ducks to feed, cows to take out to pasture and fetching water from the well. Some families have very little to eat and others still lived in houses with dirt floors. There are no toilets, you squat over a hole in the ground to take a shit and every shower was a cold shower. The beds were hard, your mattress is a thin blamket over a straw mat for those that could afford one. Dirt and dust got on everything, nothing is ever clean. Yet, in spike of all of this, I fell in love with Laos.

I did not mind taking cold showers... after a while, I almost welcome it. There was NO TV and no news of the outside world, yet, life still went on. It was ok that I was not on Facebook and did not make changes to my fantasy football lineup. Life did not end just because I did get that latest stock numbers. After awhile, I did not miss any of the technologies I was so used to. Everyone knows everyone in the village, everyone is a cousin, aunt or uncle regardless of your lastnames. For the first time in my life, I can truly say I understand what my parents meant when they say they miss the "old life" back in Laos.

On my last day and before I step into the security area at Wattay International Airport in Vientiane... tears started to stream down my face. For a country I can barely remember, I did not want to leave. For the new families and friends that I have just met, I did not want to part. And for a way of life I have never had, I wanted more.

A full summary will follow in a few days... Talk to you all soon.

LHG

[IB THIAB NEEJ]

Glade you enjoyed it. Saying "good-bye" is the hardest part. Especially when everyone is in tears.

[MenyuamHmoob]

@LonelyHmgGuy, I totally agree with all of what you said about Laos.  However, when you really think about it, places are only fun & exciting when you're visiting or vacationing there.  Once you actually live there and have to go thru all the hardships and struggles, I personally dont think it would be as pleasurable.  If you haven't noticed, everyone there dreams of coming to the United States.  Like yourself, when it came the day we had to leave, a part of me was left in Laos.  But honestly, I can only see myself visiting the country, not living there.

Also, are you telling me that you have no "tham hluas nkauj" stories to tell us? Lol. Based on what i've observed, the ladies there are so much more friendly than the Hmong girls here in the states. I dont know if its an act, but it seems they have a lot more respect for guys. Im thinking this is the MAIN reason why all the guys in the US are going crazy for girls in Laos.

[MenyuamHmoob]

Sweet Tears, Tham Hluas Nkauj is part of getting to know the culture too right? lol.  Regarding the subject of making money in the country, I dont know the specifics, but from what i saw this is what I saw;

1. Be a high ranking official (political or judicial), make average income & live an above average life
2. Get a higher education and work in a profession which pays an avg. of $100-$300 per month. (very hard to do especially if you cannot afford college, and there's no student loans, etc.)
3. Open up a store and provide goods and services (You'll see that small restaurants & shops selling drinks/ non-perishable goods are everywhere).
4. Be a farmer, grow crops, livestocks and just be happy with the simple things u have.
5. Retire there, with your 401k & Social Security and live off of your $1000-$2000 per month. Thats plenty to get by at the moment. I dont know about the future.  This is my plan!! 

[MenyuamHmoob]

yes Mam!!! If all else fails, i will just marry a young wife in Laos and commute between the US & Laos. LMFAO!!!  J/k J/k

[LonelyHmgGuy]

@LonelyHmgGuy, I totally agree with all of what you said about Laos.  However, when you really think about it, places are only fun & exciting when you're visiting or vacationing there.  Once you actually live there and have to go thru all the hardships and struggles, I personally dont think it would be as pleasurable.  If you haven't noticed, everyone there dreams of coming to the United States.  Like yourself, when it came the day we had to leave, a part of me was left in Laos.  But honestly, I can only see myself visiting the country, not living there.

Also, are you telling me that you have no "tham hluas nkauj" stories to tell us? Lol. Based on what i've observed, the ladies there are so much more friendly than the Hmong girls here in the states. I dont know if its an act, but it seems they have a lot more respect for guys. Im thinking this is the MAIN reason why all the guys in the US are going crazy for girls in Laos.

@ MenyuamHmoob and others

I was trying to leave this subject as part of a detail report to be published later on... but since you guys are asking, I will touch on the subject of "hluas nkauj" in Laos now.

*** Disclaimer to all. Before I offend anyone, everything I am about to say is solely based on a few weeks of observation, so please don't put too much weight on my opinion ***

Perhaps it is traditions or maybe it is the way they were brought up, the fact is most of the girls in Laos are very friendly. "Friendly" in the sense that everyone suitor who comes calling, regardless of his age or appearance is given the same attention, repect and affection. We can debate all day whether these girls are geniune or if there are hidden agendas to their motives... agreements will vary I am sure. For now, let's leave it alone and take it for what is is... the young girls in Laos freely give attention to those who ask. For most older Hmong men from the US, I can see the attraction of going to Laos. Over there, a 40 year old male can feel like he is 18. Here, huge age differences are a taboo and there are laws to restrict such differences. Over there, it is common practice for a 16 year old laotian female to marry a 32 year old laotian male. You do that here and chances are, you will end up in jail.

Not to justify what these girls are doing is right or wrong... but just an observation on my part. In Laos, 10-12 year old girls are already expected to care for the household... they are responsible for tasks like cleaning, washing, cooking, babysitting and helping with rice farming duties. It is common for a 16 year old to be married and 18 year olds are consider old maids. Mentally, the girls in Laos mature much faster than girls of the same age in the US, I would say 14-16 years there are more like 20-22 year olds here. So a condition exists that if you have the choice to leave a life of poverty, would you? Given a choice to live a hard life of back breaking work or a chance to see new places, do new things and to help your immediate family, I think most of us would gladly take the path of least resistance.

So... what does all of this mean and how does it affect me personally? More importantly, would you believe me if I told you how I really feel? For me, there is not enough of me that is interested in the girls in Laos. I want more than a trophy sitting at home. I want depth and intelligent, I want someone who can match ideas with me... someone who can say yes or no and have the reasons to back them up. Yes, it would be fun in the bedroom... for awhile. But not everything happens in the bedroom and what happens when you're not in bed? Life is short, choose wisely.

LHG
 

[MenyuamHmoob]

@LonelyHmongGuy...very well said brother!! Its funny you should mention Hluas Nkauj Hmoob Nplog and Hluas Nkauj Hmoob USA in the same sentence.  If you haven't noticed, that will make a lot of PH female's blood boil. LOL!!! Like you said, the attention, respect and friendliness you recieve from hluas nkauj hmoob Nplog is astronomical compared to hluas nkauj hmoob USA.  Most of them have probably got their own agenda, but don't we all have one in our search for a partner in life?  I got to say that i am mostly impressed with not just how these girls carry themselves around myself, but also with their parents, relatives and peers (old & young).

You're right to say that you'd prefer depth and intelligence, and someone who can match ideas with you...but sometimes that turns out to be a double sided dagger.  I'm not trying to say its a bad thing, but I believe what matters is someone who can provide you with unconditional love and genuinely commited to the betterment of both of your lives.

BTW, i didnt get to stay until the new years and truly regret it...maybe i will one day make the trip again. 

[MenyuamHmoob]

Nyob haus koj qhov npau sua xwb os. 

Es tau ib tug poj niam mos mos nyob nplog teb twb zoo cuag npau suav lawm nes.  Ces nws ham tsi nyob hauv kuv qhov npau suav xwb los mas....